FOOD BASICS: POOR MANS FORTINOS

Recently Girlspit and I went to the supermarket where everything is a deal, but nothing is any good. As we pushed our 25 cent deposit cart, I noticed the stock boy (well he isn't a boy he is in his mid thirties) jump from the ground, onto a shelf, jump from the shelf unto his cart and then jump from his cart unto a higher shelf. Here is the conversation the wife and I enjoyed with the stock boy


Me: Nice move
Stock boy: DO YOU KNOW TONY HAWK
Me: well yes actually my friend's youngest son..

the much excited stock boy interrupted here

Stock boy: Well I'm an extreme skateboarder like him, only I don't use a helmet or pads. Pads are for girls

Girlspit: well thank you

Stock boy: err sissy's I mean sissies. I have 20 cousins and we all skateboard and we don't use pads.

We started to walk away when stock boy jumped down on the ground to follow us

Stock boy: We don't use helmets either, none of us, we just don't believe in them.

Girlspit: thats nice

ME: man that guy is fucked

Girlspit: He will hear you

Me: So what that guy is always talking crazy

Girlspit: oh yeah do you remember last winter?

Me: why is it that bullshiters are always bringing 20 cousins into their stories

Girlspit: it’s because that sort of person has trouble making friends, so they leach onto family members who accept them and are less likely to reject them.

Me: Well I have some of the craziest cousins alive.

Girlspit: Your cousins make the stock boy look like the picture of normality